Walking past the black iron bars
Of the outdoor prison, in the square
Where people were taken for reasons unknown
And locked behind the black iron bars there
A maiden felt her wrist taken hold
by a prisoner dressed in back and gold
The inmate was pretty, but worse for wear
She wore withered flowers in her hair
The maiden had never been near this dark place
But she saw great compassion in the prisoner’s face
The worn woman held onto the young woman’s hand tight
and pulled her in close under the evening star light
The sky was filled with seas of silvery stars
The maiden saw the prison woman had deep painful scars
“Take this and listen to me”
Said the woman so sweet,
“This small velvet bag contains rubies to keep”
The maiden drew close to the woman to hear
Then secrets she whispered into her young ear…
“If by one the rubies glare
Be alert for the monster’s stare
If by two or more they light
Avert your gaze and take swift flight
If by 8 or 9 they should shine
There is no wasting time
Hide the gems and claim to be blind
The creature is already inside your mind
Only the stones of red can tell
When you are close to a creature of hell…”
She bade the maiden hide the gift in her dress
And run very fast without turning back
She said to keep running no matter the sounds
She might hear behind her….the creature was coming ’round
“Now run and run fast
Heed well what I say
Those rubies of red will save your young life one day
Stay on your path and do not get distracted
By anyone along who calls you sweet names
Hold fast to the red gems and keep them quite safe
Their light of the truth will save you
from shame and disgrace”
So the maiden held fast to the gems she kept hidden
And ran like the prisoner woman had bidden
She wanted to turn and look back if she dared
But the prison woman had forbade her to peek
The monster was coming and the woman knew all too well
What would happen to her if she looked
His blue eyes would meet hers
And his trance would be strong
And the rubies would light up in vain
This monster was a powerful one
And the maiden would fall
For his charm and the song
he would sing just for her
The prisoner watched the young maiden go straight
Along the path and away from the gate
Stuck behind black iron bars
The woman looked up at the moon and the stars
She couldn’t get free, but her truth was outside
No bars could hold the rubies of red
The gems brought her hope
For the one she passed them to
Having fashioned them out of her blood
Over time and from terrible pain
The red stones lifted her name
Outside of the prison-master’s walls
Then the screaming began
But the maiden never turned
She knew she possessed the keys
in the form of the ruby stones
to shed light on the dark ones
In the small velvet bag that was hidden in her dress
And to turn and look at the creature
Would likely mean her death
If one gem would light, she would be very cautious
If two or more glimmered, she’d turn her back
If 8 or 9 burned bright, she would run through the night
Because those rubies of red were like red flags of light
Oh, I like this very much!
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Did you get it that the rubies were the red flags of narcissistic abuse? I was wondering if it was clear?
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Yes, I found that to be clear.
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I made a few editing changes. When you get a chance, can you check it out and give me your opinion about the changes….if they are better or not
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I re-read it and the edits are great. The rubies representing the red flags is clear and brilliant.
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I am not sure where the changes are. It’s been a while since early this morning. My gut says I liked the brevity of the original better? Please take that with a huge grain of salt 🙂
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Thank you for your input. I appreciate your reading it and connecting with me.
Hope your day is lovely today.
Annie💕💙
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I wish the same for you. 🙂
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Fantastic! Brilliantly written.
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Oh thank you. That was out of my usual genre of writing. I wanted to challenge myself for a change. To make my brain work. Writing is your usual genre is easy easy. This one was a challenge/ I am glad it came out well. It took about an hour to write.
Thank you
Annie
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I made a few editing changes. When you have time can you take a look. and let me know what you think of the changes? Thank you. No rush 🙂
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h thank you so much for going back to read it again with the changes. I was so tired last night when I was writing it. I thought I would do back to take a look today. Then I thought some things needed to be a little more clear…without leaving out the mystery element.
I appreciate your taking the time to come back. I will leave the edited version up now.
Blessings.
Annie
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