Just because we point out the hole someone is about to fall into, does not mean we are being cruel to the person who dug the hole.
We are just trying to keep the person from falling in, because we recognize the hunter who is patiently watching them.
When the prey sees the hunter through the rose colored glasses he gave them, they think we are demonizing the hunter. But we are more concerned with watching our friend fall into the nasty, jagged pothole that is just a few more inches from their toes.
GentleKindness 
I agree, but that does not mean they will listen. I also decided not to track down my exes current girlfriend and warn her about him. I figured, I have done my time and I am not responsible for him or her, just me and the kids. Plus I am sure she would not believe me anyhow, so saving my time and frustration.
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No the new girlfriend will never believe the old girlfriend. The narcissist has already told them all kinds of lies about you, like how you were abusive to them and how mentally ill you are.
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That is EXACTLY what he said to her, I am 100% sure of it. Funny how they all act the same. Well she should be surprized when he is off to jail soon, he probably wont even say a thing, just never come home.
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It’s such a hard thing to convey to people within their bubble. They say all the right things and convey all the right emotions…..until they don’t. Interestingly enough, my current fiancee tried open up lines of communication with my ex in order to facilitate my daughter’s involvement in our marriage. Within just a few exchanges she caught my ex lying, several times, red-handed. I’m not even sure the woman knows reality from lies anymore….I mean, they were things that were demonstrably false and could easily be proven wrong. Thank God my fiancee knows to fact check these things and has a firm understanding of the sociopath she is. But, to convince someone in her inner circle? Not sure that’s possible:-(
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