Depression can feel like some outer dark force is trying to destroy you. People with severe depression have differences in MRI scans than other people. But even though it shows up as a physiological illness, it often feels like something else.
It can feel as though your mind is being darkened by an outside, malevolent force. Many people with severe depression have experienced mental abuse, even if it was acvompanied by other manifestations of abuse.
Mental abuse is an intentional manipulation of another person’s mind and perceptions of reality. It is an interferance with a person’s perception of themselves, their identity, and even their mental state.
People can be abused for years and never know it was abuse, because they were too young to understand, or the abuser caused a “shared psychosis” that made them perceive the abuse as something else.
Depression can feel like a malevolent force trying to manipulate and destroy you. This can be a result of past abuse that is still affecting the brain. When someone’s core reality, and identity is interfered with it does not just go away, once the abuser is no longer around to continue the abuse.
Adults who are mentally abusee by a partner can have PTSD for months or even years after the abuser has left. The abuser does this intentionally. They want control over the victim to last long after they are gone.
They engineer this in order to maintain a hold over the victim after they are gone. There are a few reasons for this, including reserving the victim on the back burner in case the abuser decides to hoover you back into their luves again, later on.
It also gives the narcissist a feeling of grandios power to have such a hold over another human being. It makes them feel godlike.
Not all people with depression were abused, but many of them were and are not attributing it to the abuse.
But this sensation that the depression is sufgocating a darkness around you from the outside, could possibly be a clue that there was some severe manipulation to your mind, by a narcissist or a psychopathic narcissist that you do not remember.