I am enjoying reviewing some of the Non Violent Communication work that I have done in the past. Today, I wanted to share this helpful insight from “Being Genuine” by Thomas D’Ansembourg.
As children so many of us take on the role of pleasers with our parents and teachers and other people. This is a strategy that worked somewhat well: We got attention, received praise and felt good about ourselves when the other person appreciated what we did for them. It was one way to get our needs met and to feel good.
Each time mother said “You are a sweetheart for doing that” or a teacher said “You are one of my best students” when you did well in tests, this behavior was reinforced.
And so the belief came about that, in order to get what we want in life, we have to please others. They will give us…
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