I love bunnies. Yay bunnies!
Here is a picture of my bunny and then some cute bunny videos from YouTube.
Narcissistic Personality Disorder has nine traits. In order to be diagnosed with Narcissistic Personality Disorder a person must have at least 5 of the traits.
Narcissism is on a spectrum.
There are many people that have 2, 3 or 4 of the characteristics on this list. These people may have elements of narcissism. They would be said to have “narcissistic traits” but rather than “full blown” narcissistic personality disorder.
People that have all 9 traits would be diagnosed with anti-social personality disorder. They are a psychopath. The more traits someone has, the more potentially dangerous they are to you.
It is difficult to know a psychopath well enough to be able to identify all of their traits because they keep things hidden and cover up their pathology by acting like a different person when they interact with others.
Here are the nine traits of narcissistic personality disorder.
1. Grandiosity – This is an unrealistic view of oneself that they are bigger than life and better than others. They feel that they have a godlike, divine or extremely powerful purpose of being on the earth. Their very being is to be admired and obeyed. Nothing is more important than they are.
2. Arrogant and Domineering – think they are better than everyone else. They know more than anyone else. Controlling of others and dominating. They see others as inferior to them in intelligence, vision, looks, and everything else. They expect other people to admire and be in awe of them.
3. Preoccupation with Success and Power – They have a need to be powerful and have a cult of followers that admire them. They like to have a harem of sorts of people around them, as if they are a king or a queen. Their drive for success and power is due to their need for narcissistic supply and to get into positions where they have manipulate people.
4. Lack of empathy – an inability to care about the feelings of others or put themselves in someone else’s shoes in an emotional way. Actually narcissists and psychopaths have a cold empathy which allows them to understand your fears, weaknesses, hopes and dreams. They can take an inventory of you and then use the your feelings against you.
5. Belief of being unique – They believe that they are very special and that they are better than everyone else. They often think that they have a unique powerful purpose that sets them above everyone else and gives them an excuse to do whatever they want and take whatever they want.
6. Sense of entitlement – They feel that they are entitled to anything and anyone they want. This includes things that belong to other people. It includes taking over the lives of other people and using people and then throwing them away like trash. There is no appreciation when people do anything for them because they were entitled to it, in the first place.
7. Requires excessive admiration – they want to be admired and paid attention to all the time. They have no tolerance for anyone else being in the spotlight. Because they need to have their false self validated, they need people to pay attention to, talk about, admire and basically worship their false self. That way the illusion of the false self stays strong.
8. Exploitative – they will take advantage of other people for their own best interest. They will take more than they give, refuse to pay people for their services in a fair way …if at all, and use people up until there is nothing left of them
9. Envious of others – they are resentful when other people have things that they feel entitled to. They become angry when they see that other people have things that they do not.
It does not matter if the other person worked for it and they did not. They are envious of the property, authority, and reputations of others. There is speculation that they are
I have included a documentary below that you might find interesting. It goes through each of the nine traits of narcissism and explains them.
Sam Vaknin is interviewed in this documentary. He is a level 9 narcissist who is unusual in that he is self aware. He is aware that he has this disorder.
One of the things that Sam says in this film, was very familiar to what I heard my most recent ex narcissist say many times.
Sam says ” …the slightest hint of criticism or disagreement threatens the precarious balance that I have created over many years…the balance that constitutes my personality…you are out to destroy and kill me, so I am out to destroy and kill you..”
My ex used to get disproportionately angry when anyone criticized him or even offered any advice or suggestion that he change anything. Even suggestions from business coaches, that he paid to advise him, were taken as a threat.
Any time anyone disagreed with him or suggested that he change anything, he would become so angry that he would become violent and inflict self harm in front of them.
I think this was a way of acting out and also of frightening people. He would scream, he would hit his own head with his fist. On a few occasions he actually strangled his own neck with his hands.
He also was known to yell in anger and rip and tear his own shirt, in front of his employees. He would threaten self harm and even suicide when anyone asked him to do anything. He said that people should do things for him. They had no right to ask him to do things, because he could not tolerate any demands.
Despite the way it may seem to you, most people do not make decisions based on rational arguments and logic from the conscious brain.
You make decisions that are driven by the beliefs and emotions of the subconscious parts of the brain.
The limbic system is the emotional brain. It is one of the three brains described by the Triune Brain Theory, developed by Paul MacLean. This theory was conceived of by research and experience in order to develop a model based on the study of evolutionary development of the human brain. Over time the different parts of the brain developed as a natural evolution in response to the survival needs of humans.
According to this theory, the three brains are as follows:
The Reptilian Brain is the primal brain. It was the first part of the brain that developed. The early people used this brain for protection, survival and procreation of the species. The drives from this part of the brain are very strong, and they are at the root of many decisions to make on a daily basis.
This reptilian part of your brain scans for danger and seeks safety and also pleasure. It encourages you away from pain or any threats in your environment. This part of the brain is very active in people with PTSD from trauma. It also gives you sexual drives and is at the root of impulses.
The Limbic System is the second part of the brain that was developed. The limbic system contains the emotions and deals with behavior in response to emotions. It also processes memories and associations you have between experiences and feelings. This part of the brain consists of the hippocampus, the amygdala, and the hypothalamus.
If you have ever made a decision that did not seem rational to you, and you can’t figure out why you did it, then it may have been driven by a combination of the reptilian brain and the emotions from the limbic system.
The conscious brain is made of two hemispheres and it is called the hippocampus, the Neocortex.
These hemispheres have been responsible for the development of human language, abstract thought, imagination, and consciousness. The neocortex is flexible and has almost infinite learning capabilities
Learning ways to access and understand what is happening in your subconscious brain, is a valuable tool to understanding your emotions and behaviors. Hypnosis is one tool that can help you to access your subconscious and heal certain emotional wounds that you may be carrying.
Old emotional wounds can affect your feelings and behavior in ways that may no longer be supporting you.
There are a variety if things that can be done while under various levels of hypnosis. If you are working with an ethical hypnotherapist, you will have control over any and all alterations in the neural pathways of your brain. You can create positive changes that will allow you to live your life in ways that allow you to experience things in that way that you would like to.
In addition to accessing and healing old emotional wounds, you can identify any false beliefs that you may be holding in your subconscious about yourself. Many of our perceptions were programmed into us while we were young. Some of these beliefs may be untrue and have a negative effect on our emotions and ability to achieve the things we want.
If you are interested in finding out more about how hypnotherapy can benefit you…
If you have negative self talk that you know is holding you back from things you know you can do….
If you are curious about the possibilities of realizing ways you can create amazing changes in the way you frame your reality…
Then please visit my new web site GentleAwakening.com and send me a contact message. I will respond yo you via email, and talk with you more about what hypnotherapy can do for you. Or you can reach me by email at firstname.lastname@example.org
And we can schedule a 15 dollar discounted first time session, so you can try it out and discover what you can realize about yourself that you didn’t even know that you knew, because that information has been driving your unconscious brain, and your conscious brain was not aware of it.
We have been conditioned to believe that we have to think and feel certain ways in order to fit in, succeed in life, please others, and survive.
At the core of the pain we feel from bullying is the survival instinct.
Even the need to be accepted, comes down to the way our brains our wired for self protection and survival. Being thrown out of the tribe is associated with death, in our primal brains….the reptilian cortex.
We instinctively feel threatened and fearful when rejected by a group of people that we need to associate with on a regular basis.
Even the term “workplace harassment” is rooted in this need to be accepted. Otherwise continued emotionally/ mentally hurtful acts by one employee to another would not be recognized as wrong.
The act on one co-worker starting a smear campaign against you is so emotionally destructive that if it goes in long enough, your mental health will suffer. You will most likely develop depression and anxiety.
Someone spreading lies about you, with the intention of turning the tribe against you, is a menace to the social order. Only the most malevolent member of the social / work. organization would engage in premeditated behavior and calculated actions to remove you from favor within the group.
While I used to believe that what more than one person pointed out about you must be true, I now believe that circumstances like that require further investigation.
I was brought up with the idea that if three different people pointed out some flaw in your character, or behavior, that it must be true. But a situation like this requires some more testing on your part.
If the same annoying trait has been pointed out to you from people who do not know each other, and have no connections with each other, then you might want to take a look at it. But if people who are inter-related at a workplace, a church, a school, or within a family are accusing you of having something wrong with you, that you truly cannot see, then it may be fabricated.
The toxic person will tell others within the social structure lies about you that make you appear to have a completely different personality than you actually have.
Often it is something that is completely the opposite of your true character. If you are innately and ethically very honest, then they will tell people that you are dishonest.
Once this circulates back to your being treated as if the lie were true, you will naturally suspect that something about your behavior is giving people that impression. Even if this accusation is very far out of reality, once people begin to react to you as if it were true, you will feel mental and emotional stress.
This is part of the design of this type of slander. The smear campaign is designed to break you down both emotionally and mentally. It is also designed to turn other people against you. It is very effective in blocking your social and professional progress.
Of it takes on a life of its own, one rumor has the capacity to cause you to not only leave the group or the job, but also to begin to doubt your own reality.
This is a form of gaslighting. It is the fabrication an untruth, that is superimposed upon the reality you once knew to be true.
Due to our natural wiring to be accepted by the group, we do not want other people controlling the way we are perceived by others. The personality qualities and values we want to portray, are important to us, and even a key part of our survival within the social structure.
It is somewhat frightening to realize that it only takes one toxic person, skilled in the art of the smear campaign, to alter who we are, and how we are perceived, in the minds of an entire social group…even as large as an entire community. I have clients that have had to move to another city to restart their lives, and lots of people have changed jobs due to similar evil being perpetrated against them.
The level of destructiveness one simple rumor can cause limitless.
Hundreds of preteens and teenagers commit suicide over what started out as one rumor. Bullies have caused havoc in the schools for as long as any of us can remember.
The newest mutation of the smear campaign, of course, is cyber bullying. This gives the lazy narcissist an easy way to plant a lie about someone, and not have to be held accountable for having done it. Their identity can be hidden behind a false profile and a fake photo image.
So if you are being accused of having defects that you don’t relate to at all, you should explore the truth of that in social situation and with people far removed from the original source. Talk to people that are far removed from any of the people that have accused you.
If this particular personality trait is not recognized by outsiders to the problematic group, then you probably don’t have it. If people who do not know anyone in the toxified group do not seem to see you in this distorted way, then you can rest assured about your personality being perfectly fine.
In situations where someone is trying to destroy everyone’s perception about you, it is not an issue of your behavior not being in line with how you want people to see you. You are not defective or unclear in your perceptions about yourself.
However, you very likely may have to remove yourself from the place where the toxic person has ruined your reputation. Once people’s minds become manipulated, it can be impossible to get them to see reality.
People tend to want to hold onto whatever reality they have. Shifts in perspective are not often welcome.
It takes too much work for people to do, and they often do not have the flexibility to do so. In addition to those reasons, people tend to feel threatened when they are presented with a conflicting reality to one they have been presented with and have been functioning out of.
The power of the smear campaign comes out of the number of people who are saying the same thing, and reacting as if it were true. Even the body language of other people around you will influence the perception someone has of you. It goes far beyond the words.
One of the most destructive places that a smear campaign can exist within is your family. If you grew up with a narcissistic parent, you may have had your identity challenged or interfered with by your own parent. It can also be another family member.
Even your own adult child can create or contribute to a smear campaign. Luckily most people do not experience this, because it is possibly the most hurtful of all. But I can tell you that I have seen it before withcertain clients.
Being aware of how the smear campaign works does not really prevent it from happening to you. But it can help to validate your reality, and keep you from thinking you are the crazy one.
Narcissists and other toxic people will probably always exist. It is like the predators and prey in the animal kingdom. We just have to be aware of it and take whatever steps are needed to protect ourselves from the damage.
Your mental stability is the main thing that any good human predator is going to attack. All the games are designed at making you question your reality and to doubt yourself. If they can take those things from you, the rest becomes easy.
You must maintain your sense of self and your belief in yourself. Detach mentally and emotionally from the behaviors of people who make you feel unsafe.
Listen to your feelings when you are around people. This is your first warning system, long before you have any evidence that they are toxic.
Come See the Video List Page for Annie Mimi Hall Youtube Channel
Frequently Asked Questions
What made you start this channel?
I originally began this channel simply as a way to heal from the abusive relationships I had been in. I was newly out of an abusive relationship and was suffering severe narcissistic abuse syndrome and PTSD from abuse. The videos were originally a way of making a journal and maintaining my reality about what happened.
How has the channel evolved over time ?
The channel has evolved into a life coaching channel for helping other victims and survivors of abuse, to get their self esteem , their self confidence and their motivation for living back, Also to help them identify reasons they were targeted and why they were drawn into a relationship with a toxic person, and how to avoid it happening again.
How do you interact with your followers?
I try to respond to comments every few days. I go back through and make an effort not to miss any comments from follower of the channel. I try to respond to questions to best of my ability, which includes giving links to resources and sometimes videos by other youtubers who specialize in the topics the person may be asking me about.
What are your Future Goals for the channel?
I enjoy doing this channel and I plan to continue. I would like to expand by adding some interviews with youtubers, survivors of abuse, life coaching, and other appropriate people that I feel my followers would ind relevant and interesting.
Visit my YouTUbe Channel HERE