Authentically You

πŸŒΌβ­πŸ’œπŸ’•πŸŒ·

You are a unique being. Your gifts and dreams are important.

We were not made to be plastic dolls to be used like puppets by the manipulative ones.

Society is so brainwashed by all sorts of media and organized social structures. You are not their puppet either.

You are not a cardboard cut-out , here to play the role someone else thinks you should play.

You are not here to just be part of someone else’s narrative. You make your own movie and your own story.

Be free and be authentically you.

My Top Favorite Self Care Behaviors

self care

Self care is part of self parenting. If you have C-PTSD from childhood abuse, emotional trauma, or neglect, then you were probably not taught to care for yourself.

If your emotional needs were regularly discounted then you were trained to ignore your feelings about being uncomfortable, and taught to hide those feelings. You were not able to get what you needed to make your environment feel safe and comfortable.

If your parents did not make an effort to care for your need to feel safe and comfortable, then you were programmed into discounting your own comfort needs.

Everone has the need to feel comfort, safety and pleasure. It is not selfish to have these needs. It is normal and it is part of the survival instinct.

As an adult who came from a narcissistic pareny or otherwise dysfunctional family, you have to learn how to parent yourself now. …Not in the same way you were parented as a child. But in a nurturing, compassionate way.

Learning thow to care for yourself will allow you to have more energy and patience ti share your love with other people.

Love the loving. Maintain behaviors of self love and then show compassion to people who have the capacity for love and empathy. Do not waste energy trying to change unloving people.

So here is a list of my top 10 favorite self care ideas. Please share your own favorite ideas in the comments below.

1. Wrap up in hot towels from the dryer. You don’t have to be doing wash at the time. Just toss 2 or 3 nice towels in the dryer and dry them on high, for 10 or 15 minutes. Then wrap up in them.

2. Cover yourself in soft blankets. Buy one special blanket that has your favorite texture. Running your hands over pleasing textures can calm the nervous system, similar to petting a soft furred animal.

3. Take a warm shower or bath. You don’t have to wait until you need to bathe. Hot steamy showers have a healing effect and calm the nervous system. Submersing yourself in a bath of warm water will help you be mindful of the present moment.

4. Listen to music that makes you feel empowered. Your favorite music has a direct effect on your nervous system and will generate dopamine and feel-good chemical responses.

5. Petting and playing with your favorite kind of animals. Animals are living spiritual beings. Different people are drawn to different animals for different emotional and spiritual energies that these animals have.

6. Water has healing properties. Drinking clean water…swimming in water… and being near the ocean, stream… or a beautiful sparkling lake…all have spiritually uplifting possibilities.

7. Creating your perfect sleep space. Your sleeping area needs to be a calm haven of nurturing and soothing quality. Alter your lighting with red or other colored light bulbs in a table lamp. Add soothing sounds and textureus. The colors should be ones that are important to you and have an affect on your nervous system.

8. Uplifting words. Read or watch videos by people who inspre you. Your self esteem should feel boosted after spending time with a message that energizes and validates you.

9. Learn to say NO, without feeling obligated to make them agree that your reasons are valid. Being afraid to say NO to people will cause you to be forced into situations that deplete your energy and your self esteem.

10. Create things that are inventive, artistic, authentic or unique. Draw, color, craft, write a poem, sing in your unique voice, write, create a new yoga routine, rearrange items in a unique way, decorate a box, add fringe to your lampshade with a hot glue gun, change the laces in your sneakers to colored ones, make a beaded bracelet, plant some flowers, choose your favorite material at JoAnne fabrics and lay it on your table for a table cloth, buy a bag of buttons at the craft store and sew them onto your tops and jackets, add some coloful garnishes to your dinner plate….explore….create…don’t worry about comparing your creativity to others….be yourself!

 

 

Shame Holds us Back from Our Possibilities

This is a great talk by Brene Brown.

She describes the difference between shame and guilt very elegantly here. She has done extensive research about shame, and states that it is a cause of depression, anxiety and suicide in most cultures.Β 

She talks about shame as an epidemic in our culture and how the media and society program us for shame. The ads that tell us how we “should be,”
Β and what we “should be doing.” …to the people in our lives that expect us to live up to unreasonable standards.Β 

Shame can come from abuse and emotional trauma in our childhoods, and in our adulthood experiences. Shame is programmed into us by others. You can re-wire the brain with thought patterns that are more supportive for you. Shame is a destroyer.

I believe that many mental disorders are based in shame. I work with abuse survivors that carry loads of shame from their past. Even when people come to the realization that they were abused, the shame does not just go away. In fact sometimes it becomes worse, during the healing process because old wounds are being opened up.Β 

Walking through the programs that are in your brain is important, to be able to find the truth about yourself. You are a special, unique person.

You do not have to carry toxic shame with you.

You cannot change the past, but you can change the meaning of the memories that you carry of it.Β 

The people that planted those seeds were just trying to meet their own agenda by keeping you down, and unsure of your value and place in the world.Β 

Brene Brown makes the point that creativity, inventiveness, and change come from a place of vulnerability. Doing things that are different, and uniquely you means you have to be somewhat vulnerable.

The greatest minds of the world came up with original ideas and creations and discoveries. They were not always met with acceptance.Β 

You do not have to follow the crowd. You have your own voice…you just have to find it and differentiate that authentic voice from the programs that were implanted into your brain. Shame is one of those programs that is no longer serving you.Β 

 

Meaning and Reality

You are a unique person and your perspective about things is as valid as anyone else’s. Others will try to force their interpretion of things upon you, but you are a sovereign individual.

People have their own belief systems and their own agenda. Being sleep deprived, and tired from the daily struggle to survive can take its toll on your will power.

When your will power is depleted, it is easier for people to persuade you towards their interpretations. Even the media, and society can influence us to go against our true feelings about what we see and hear.

You can pretend to have a “hold button” Β like one you would find on an office telephone. Deciding what meaning to attach to things can wait until your will power is higher.

Low blood sugar and sleep deprivation are two main things that can keep you from thinking clearly. Feelings in the body are always telling you something. Intuition is felt in the body. Bad feelings about something are felt in a physical way.

Things like being tired , stressed and uncomfortable are likely to interfere with your ability to feel your true feelings about something. This is why sleep deprivation and withholding food are common tactics of brainwashers like cult leaders.

Don’t allow others to form your feelings and thoughts. Put things on hold, by pressing your hold button. Wait until a bet time, when you can be introspective, to create your personal meanings for things that occur.

All things are not as they seem, and they often are not what others present to you. Truth and meaning can become convoluted.

Believe in yourself, and your higher consciousness to guide you. Rest, eat, and think for yourself. The meanings and perspective of your personal reality are yours, and should support your mental , physical , emotional, and spiritual well being.

Namaste,

AnnieπŸ’•

Take a Walk with me….

Itching

Fatigue

Rashes

Skin pealing

Arthritis

Back pain

Insomnia

Hang nails

Infections

Pink eye

Vomiting

Hair loss

Things our higher spiritual self does not have to deal with.

No wonder we become distracted, redirected and forgetful about being in touch with our higher consciousness level selves.

We can’t even call them on the cell phone, never mind ask them to relate to what we go through.

Getting into a higher level state requires detaching from our Β physical selves. It is like ignoring the squeakiest wheel. ….and as we know, the squeaky wheel gets the attention.

We can have wonderful intentions of growing towards a higher consciousness level and then we develop some new pain or disorder…whether mental or physical.

We are subjected to all manner of mind control and persuasion techniques by society and the manipulators within it. And our bodies take more and more of a beating as we age.

Beating yourself up over not being able to get yourself out of your physical self and into a spiritual state, is another beating you should not have to endure.

It is effectually a beating of the consciousness by the consciousness…

A beating of the sub conscious by the sub conscious….

A beating of the mind by itself.

It is a paradox that you must accept the pains without the ego being involved because becoming one with higher consciousness means letting go of and identity with the self….yet repressing feelings about suffering only makes the suffering grow.

So we have to accept the inner child in order to heal…accept suffering as part of existing in the physical realm….sit with our pain to comfort it to ease it….walk through painful experiences to get to the light on the other side….and detach from the ego and identifying with our identity in order to achieve a higher consciousness…..

Yet in detaching from our ego we are acknowledging our identity with it…..so we first have to recognize the ego as a construct that is heavily influenced by brainwashing, false beliefs programmed into us, and manipulative people with their own agendas to serve..

We then can understand that many of our automatic Β thoughts and attachments come out of this programming. …making the majority of the tapes running in our subconscious mind basically bad viruses…..and our conscious negative thoughts results of the viruses…..

Then we can begin to understand that We Are Not Our Thoughts….

Once we begin to accept that we are not our thoughts, we can open the subconcious mind to new formatting….better programming….we can alter and add new beliefs…and delete contaminated beliefs…..

A new understanding begins to arise at the back of our brains where those core beliefs are housed….that if our thoughts are not us, then we can observe our thoughts and evaluate their validity….

Holding onto beliefs that no longer serve us is not neccessary. We will not simply stop being ourselves by changing our core beliefs. It is the attachment to those addictive beliefs and thought patterns that keeps us controlled by others….and by our physical existance…..

We are not, in fact, the sum of our thoughts. We can rearrange the furniture in our brains that we call our thoughts. Rearranging the furniture, throwing out old pieces, adding new pieces that better serve our house….

The house remains, even when the things inside are altered.

So who is doing the altering and rearranging? It is not our physical selves….It is not our thoughts that are observing themselves….

Once we begin to realize this, then we catch a glimpse of what is doing the observing….It is not within the brain or the physical body….

It is that higher self…the higher consciousness….that can be awakened to observe and repair the subconscious …where suffering is at its roots….

Thoughts about suffering seem to create more suffering…and fear that the suffering will get worse….or continue to last is the root of the most painful mental and physical suffering.

Yet somehow you are beginning to suspect the most curious thing of all….that by entering this kind of trance….the one you have allowed your mind to enter while reading this….you were able to detach from your physical suffering for a few minutes…..

And so we took the journey together….just you and I….in a higher realm of consciousness….

Namaste..

 

 

 

 

Empathic, Compassionate Energy Fields

Every act of compassion matters. Each time you offer a kindness to another living being it matters.

Whether or not you feel that they appreciated your intention afterwords or not, does not change what your intention was.

Sometimes we are not aware of the motives of others, or what is going on in their heads. You may have had a relationship with someone for a long time, and then realized that they never felt the way you thought they did.

They may not have accepted your loving intentions in the way you wanted them to. Some people feel entitled to your service, and therefore cannot truly appreciate the caring intention behind things you did for them. This does not change what your intention was.

Just because the reality of someone is different than your own does not change the power of your personal meaning for acts of compassion and kindness towards them.

Kindness can be shown to random strangers or even people who you never see. You may have held the door for a mom who was struggling with babies and bags at the store. Your small kindness may have affected her mood in a way that it was passed into her…and then she passed the kindness energy along to someone in her home.

You do not always see the domino effect of your good heart.

It is true that sometimes people will turn on you when you least expect it. You may feel that this negates every kindness you ever showed them. But this is not true.

Kindness and compassion are poweful energies. They exist in spite of people who cannot accept or appreciate their pure essence.

This is not to say that you should allow people to walk over you. It is not to encourage you to go out of your way for manipulative people. Not at all.

It is just let you know that your intentions always matter. They have a far more reaching effect than the particular person or situation.

Generating loving intentions towards others sends these intentions out into the energy fields all around you. You can send positive energies to someone sitting near you on the bus, and never speak a word to them.

The energy of intention takes on a life of its own. If you are empathic at all, then you can feel when someone near you is projecting bad energy like anger or evil intention. It is felt in your gut or other places in the body.

The people around you feel and receive the intentions you create. You can self generate compassion and kindness. It can be sent tosomeone else with a gentle touch on the shoulder, or just by making eye contact.

Studies have been able to prove that there are magnetic fields of energy that are projected out from each individual person.

In fact this is true for all living things. That is why you can feel certain kinds of grounding energies when you are in nature.

Trees and plants give off magnetic energy fields. Human magnetic energy fields extend at least 3 to 6 feet in all directions, based on scientific research and studies.

Paying attention to your gut feelings can protect you from people sending malicious energies. It can also guide you toward people that create positive intention and project that compassion outward for others to feel and access.

Some people are energy vampires. You feel drained of energy after spending time with them.

Others are generous with their beautiful strengthening energies. Humans can transmit feelings of Β empathy, excitement, acceptance and many other loving energy fields.

Any act of kindness or positive intention you have done or will do, matters. Anytime you project compassion, it has an effect on the collective consciousness of living things.

Even if it turns out that you could not connect with someone in the way you wanted to or expected to, your positive intentions were still sent out to other living beings around you.

Try to surround yourself with loving, supportive people that accept your beautiful pure energies.

Even if someone has let you down in the past, you can still connect with caring people.

Your intentions matter, although you cannot change people who do not want to change. Everyone will not see you for who you are.

Everyone will not be receptive to healing energies, empathy or kindness. Some people just want to see how much they can manipulate you. Try to learn how to identify these kinds of people, so you can minimize contact with them.

The higher your consciousness level, the more truth you will see about the energy fields being projected by others.

Low consciousness levels will attract other people in similar consciousness levels.

Abuse and trauma can sometimes bring your consciousness level down, and affect what kinds of energy you are projecting.

Be careful to assess your psychological and spiritual state, before interacting with others.

Strengthen your ability to self generate states you want to be in.

Awareness of your intuition, gut feelings and energy sensations in your body will help you to self generate specific states.

All of your compassionate intentions have mattered and will continue to matter.

Even intentions that you sent out to people undeserving of those intentions, are not lost. The effect on the energetic dimension was still there, even if the person you were trying to care for had ulterior Β motives.

People may try to drain your energies because they can control a drained person easier than someone filled with excitement and purpose.

You can build energy projection skills. You can practice self generating moods and states of being. The better you become at these skills, the more powerful you will be.

Namaste,

AnnieΒ 

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Emotional Wounds

Depression is a serious illness that reduces the quality and length of people’s lives. If you suffer from depression you probably feel very alone because the people around you do not understand.

Having your serious mental health disorder minimized, disregarded, or disbelieved can make the feelings worse. Over time negative emotions that are repressed will manifest themselves into mental disorders and eventually physical illness.

There can be more involved at the root of depression than people realize. Most sufferers of depressive disorders, and anxiety disorders, have old emotional wounds from childhood that were ignored and not tended to. The inner child is fractured and left in an unsafe place.

Feeling unsafe in the world, is rooted in childhood neglect of emotional needs. You did not have to be physically beaten in order to sustain serious emotional wounds as a child and a teenager.

If your feelings were minimzed, especially during traumatic events like divorce, alcoholic parents, violence in the home, poverty, dislocation or other things where you felt powerless….then you were left being taught that the world is emotionally unsafe and that you had to repress your feelings about that.

It does not go away until the inner child is recognized and nurtured. The fractured parts of you are crying to be heard. Continuing to ignore, shove down and minimize the inner child will further traumatize you.

Society wants you to shove down your feelings and stop being a baby. But what if the infant was never loved properly or cared for in a way it felt safe? Β Time does not remove that infant part from you.

You are not separated from your younger selves. They are a part of your entire being. It all needs to be validated, including fractured child parts that were not loved in the way they needed to be.

It is no wonder that after years of being told to move on, “leave the past behind you” that you now have serious depression illness. It is the same as a Soul Sickness.

We are made of different perceptions and realities. Our emotional and spiritual realities are very important. Putting on a mask every day, and ignoring those parts of you will lead to severe depression and anxiety disorders.

Any pain in the body, or the mind is always telling you that something has been neglected. There are no amount of pills that will fix the Soul Sickness.

Your brain looks for ways to replay out scenarios from your childhood that were neverresolved. You will continue to find yourself in circumstances, and with people that bring up the old emotional wounds.

You have to find ways to connect with, communicate with and comfort the inner child , so that they feel heard and safe.

*for more info, articles, affirmations, and info about coaching for Soul Sickness, narcissistic abuse, hypnosis and NLP healing…please join the mailing list at gentlekindnesscoaching.com

Namaste,

Annie

Feeling Safe and Deflecting Shame from Others

The people that try to make you feel guilt or shame over not doing what they want you to do, are just serving their own agenda.

If they continue to try to emotionally manipulate you, they have no concern for your reality. They do not respect your right to see things from your own point of view.

People will claim to know what you should start doing…or stop doing..that will make you a better person. But take a closer look and see that they are trying to get you to fit into their own agenda.

You do not have to change your core beliefs to make someone else’s reality more comfortable. They are clearly not changing their beliefs to suit you.

If you are not trying to guilt and shame them, then what right do they have to do it to you. What gives one person, or one group of people, exclusive rights to know everything that everyone “should” and “should not” be doing?

Shaming people is not loving. Any group or individual that is making you feel bad about yourself, or trying to make you question your own truth to support theirs, is more concerned with serving their own agenda than wanting you to be your authentic self.

People that claim to care about your best interest, but try to shame and guilt you into changing for them, do not have your best interest at heart….but they have their own best interest at heart.

So let them continue to follow their own path and do what they feel best supports them…..while you follow your own path and do what best supports you.

Why is it okay for them to want an environment they feel safe and supported in….but you are selfish because you also want to feel safe and supported?

Time for All Good Little Insomniacs to go to Sleep

Time for all good little insomniacs to go to sleep… It is 4:40 am.

Thank you to all of you for keeping me company today. My life would be lonelier without you.

Bless you all and see you tomorrow.

Much love,Β AnnieπŸ‡πŸ‡πŸ‡πŸ’•β€πŸ‡πŸ‡πŸ‡πŸ’•β€πŸ‡πŸ‡πŸ‡πŸ’•β€πŸ‡πŸ‡πŸ‡πŸ’•β€πŸ‡πŸ‡πŸ‡πŸ’•β€

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Follow Your Meaningful Path

visions meme

Your life Β direction is inside of you. Don’t let other people talk you into following the wrong path.Β 

If something does not feel right to you, then it isn’t right for you. Listen to your own feelings and the sensations on your body.

Your inner voice will direct you to follow your purpose.Β 

You need to differentiate between your true voice and the inner tapes that were put into your brain by other people.

Negative thoughts about yourself are bad programming, Β usually installed during childhood and reinforced by abuse during adulthood.Β 

Your dreams are important.

Your special talents are needed by people in the world. If you feel inspired to follow a certain path, don’t let people tell you that you cannot or should not do it.Β 

Look into your own mind and soul for your purpose and for what really would make you happy.Β 

Anxiety and depression are ways your true self has of letting you know that changes need to be made in your life.

Past trauma needs to be healed and memories need to be integrated. Β It is important that the inner tapes …that tell you that you are unworthy… do not hold you back.Β 

Find your path. It is never too late.

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