Safe Dating – Some Predators Establish Trust by Telling You Personal Stories that May not be True

The world is full of all kinds of people. Some people are honest for the most part and other people are dishonest. The dishonesty can be at different levels and for different reasons. Dating can be a harrowing experience and it is hard to know who to trust and who not to trust.

When you are first getting to know someone you should go at a pace that is comfortable for you. Rushing too fast into emotional intimacy and sharing of personal information too early can end badly. This is someone you do not know and you have no way to know what kind of person they really are.

People normally open up to another person a little bit at a time. Be wary of anyone that shares extremely personal stories with you on the first couple of dates. They may be telling the truth but they also may be making stories up in order to make you trust them. 

Some predators establish trust with you by telling you very personal things right away and then saying that you are the only one they talk to about this. If they do not know you yet, then why are they choosing you to share something this personal with? Just be careful.

Some predators will make up or exaggerate stories about their past in order to gain your sympathy and to establish trust. Then they put you in a position of feeling like you now have to share something very personal with them. 

Avoid giving out very personal information on the first few dates. Do not go to the next level of trust too early in a relationship. Only share things you are comfortable sharing and not just because they shared with you. Some people want to know about your past in order to know ways they can trigger feelings in you, in order to manipulate you later on.

If you are in doubt then don’t do it. If it does not feel right then do not say it. If someone shares something that seems to personal to trust anyone you just met with, then this might be a red flag that the person is playing a role in order to make you think they are someone they are not.

This video is just to remind people that some people are truthful and others are not. Unless you have gotten to know someone, you do not know what their intentions are yet. 

Go at a pace that makes sense to you and do not let someone else guide the pace if emotional or physical intimacy for you. Know your standards and set your boundaries. Be kind about it but firm.

If something feels wrong or seems to contradict what you know to be true, then be proceed with caution. There is plenty of time to get to know someone a little at a time. Friendship is the best basis for a relationship. You should enjoy your time together and feel safe and respected at all times. 

You should feel like you can let them know if something is uncomfortable to you. You can find someone that you will be happy with and that is safe if you use your head as well as your heart. You want someone that has a healthy respect for boundaries and that goes at an even pace with the relationship.

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My shelter from the storm

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My friend and confidant

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