It’s okay to experience your feelings . You are human and it is human to feel emotions, in all their complexity.
It is about balance and the ability to live your life, emotios and all. Sometimes we have to just do the next logical thing, based on what we know. We may not feel like taking any action, when we are overwhelmed by emotion, but when action needs to be taken, it needs to be taken.
It is part of the maturing process into adulthood, and into healing, to be able to keep moving forward to take care of ourselves.
There can be time to think about and process emotions. You have to assess the situation and decide when action needs to happen right now instead. Then time can be allowed for thinking about the feelings afterwards.
Don’t overthink or judge your negative feelings. They are just visitors for a time. They don’t have to stay permanently.
To judge yourself for feeling a certain way is counterproductive. Accept yourself and accept the feelings that arise.
Don’t identify with them to where you feel defined by them. They are just occuring. They are not you.
Ask different questions than the ones you are asking now. We tend to ask “why” questions, but they can be counterproductive.
Ex : “Why did they treat me that way?”
“Why didn’t I see that coming ?”
“Why do these things always happen to me ?”
“Why am I so …”
“Why did I do …”
Change the questions to generate a more resourceful state of mind.
Ex: ” What can be done next ?”
“How can I make this work?”
“What would a better plan be ?”
“How can I adjust this course of action?”
“What can I take with me from this and move on?”
Re-framing the questions you are askng yourself, will help guide your mindset back a problem solving one.