adult children of narcissistic abuse', adult children with alcoholic parents, affirmations, aftermath of narcissistic abuse, empowerment, genltekindnesscoaching, gentle kindness coaching, manipulated by a narcissist, manipulative people, mental illness, narcissistic abuse syndrome, narcissistic mothers, narcissistic parents, toxic personaloties, Toxic shame

Follow Your Meaningful Path

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Your life  direction is inside of you. Don’t let other people talk you into following the wrong path. 

If something does not feel right to you, then it isn’t right for you. Listen to your own feelings and the sensations on your body.

Your inner voice will direct you to follow your purpose. 

You need to differentiate between your true voice and the inner tapes that were put into your brain by other people.

Negative thoughts about yourself are bad programming,  usually installed during childhood and reinforced by abuse during adulthood. 

Your dreams are important.

Your special talents are needed by people in the world. If you feel inspired to follow a certain path, don’t let people tell you that you cannot or should not do it. 

Look into your own mind and soul for your purpose and for what really would make you happy. 

Anxiety and depression are ways your true self has of letting you know that changes need to be made in your life.

Past trauma needs to be healed and memories need to be integrated.  It is important that the inner tapes …that tell you that you are unworthy… do not hold you back. 

Find your path. It is never too late.

emotional abuse, empowerment, Healing after abuse, mental abuse, mental health, mental illness, self love, self-esteem, self-help, spirituality, Toxic shame

Your Possibilities are Greater than You Think

There is no one quite like you. You are unique in many ways. You are a spiritual being that is existing in the body you are inhabiting.

You could have made different choices that may have sent you on a slightly different path. You may have ended up at a different job or with different people if you had made different moves on the chess board.

You still would have been the same being. Your values may be re-prioritized as you grow and learn. There are no paths that change you from who you were born as into a completely different spiritual being.

You have no way to know how things would have turned out if you had made different choices because life is unpredictable and you cannot control others.

There is no need to feel bad over decisions that you think sent you away from the “right” path. You have no way to know what would have happened or if it would not have been worse.

Even things you feel that you really screwed up….you don’t really know that it would have been the way you picture it to be if you had not done that.

It does not serve you to hold shame and guilt about the past. You are still on your journey either way.

Your story is not completed. Often there are many paths that lead to the same place.

Any one decision from your past could have sent you a different way that could have landed you somewhere similar eventally…or somewhere worse depending on the events that could have followed that decision.

Life is full of unknowns and there are many things you cannot control…such as other people.

Memories tend to deceive us anyway. They are images and feelings that are filtered through our perception at the time …in addition to our current perception.

But the memories are missing information that we did not have such as what another person was really thinking or feeling.

You may regret ending a relationship and you are sure that you lost the best thing that will ever come your way. But you do not know for sure what the other person was thinking or what they would have been feeling a year from then.

These are all unknowns. Memories can deceive us because our brains fill in missing information. The story we create about what would have happened is just that….a story.

Life is in the present. We are affected by our past experiences and what meaning that our brains attach to those experiences.

Being in the present without carrying shame and guilt is the best way to be able to experience our spiritual selves to the fullest extent.

We are not who we are because of the things we have done. The things we did were based on what was happening at the time.

We had certain meaning attached to the things that were happening. We may not even be in touch with that meaning anymore.

We do not really fully remember exactly how we felt at that time. Many details are forgotten over time, including what triggers may have been occurring and what fears we may have been feeling at that moment.

Carrying shame and guilt over our past decisions is unfair you ourselves. It only serves to lower your self esteem and interferes with your ability to make decisions that are good for you now.

Judgement of ourselves is bad enough when it is done by others. When other people hold anger and judgement about us it is from their own perception of the past.

Just like us, their memories are bits of pictures and feelings with much of the information being filled in by their own brain which tells a story.

Details that are unknown to them, such as how you felt and what was happening in your subconscious mind, are missing from their information…so they make things up to fill in the holes.

Much of what they project onto you comes from their own perception and is wrong. So their jugdement of you is coming from a flawed reality of what really happened.

Do not carry other people’s judgement of your past as your true past. It is not true reality. You are not able to reach your possibilities if you are carrying these things with you.

You are the same spiritual being that was born. Your decisions and choices seemed neccassary at the time. They are in the past now.

Allow yourself to lift this weight from yourself. You will be able to be there for the people in your life right now, in a much more meaningful way, if you can be yourself and accept that you have innate worth.

You were born with worth and your past does not change that. We spend too much energy carrying memories that are convoluted anyway.

Your life is here and now. It does not matter how you ended up here. How you got where you are is no indication of where you can go and what possibilities your life holds for you.

Past limitations are just shadows. You have much more potetial than you realize yet. Just allow for the possibility that you can do greater things than you can imagine right now.

There is great power in allowing for possibiities and not limiting yourself based on what you think you remember doing in the past.

Your possibilities are full and your value is still for you to discover.



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