christmas, holiday, mental illness

Merry Christmas

Merry christmas. I finished wrapping gifts a couple of hours ago. I was chillin with netflix for the last few hours.

It is 4 am and I have to be downstairs to take my kids to Christmas with their grandparents, father, cousind and Aunt and Uncle in 5 hours. So I have to sleep quick and wake up in 4 hours.

I can take a nap after that I think. I wish I could do Christmas my way but you know how it is when you live with people and they have to be in charge.

They have a very strict system / routine for Christmas morning that goes against my grain but hopefully my k8ds will have fun.

I miss my own family. My ex husband’s family always demanded or guilted us into having every holiday with them. The few times in 20 years I went to my father’s on a holiday always resulted in years of reminders by my in laws and shaming.

They are very sure they are entitled to every holiday with the grandchildren and do not want to show compassion that my dad never sees them.

I actualy would have ignored them thus year and gone to Baltimore anyway to see my Dad, but I did not have the funds to travel and my arthritis has gotten too much to be able to make the 6 hour drive by myself.

Maybe next year I will have a second driver. My older daughter should get her license this year. Better yet, maybe there will be a nice guy in my life by then and they can drive for me.

I took pictures of the tree which I will post later today. I even made some crafta today which I will also show you. I really enjoyed that. It has been a long time since I made anything.

The kids are asleep and I tucked the bunny into his cage and kissed him goodnight. So good night and see you all later this afternoon.

Try to have a relaxing and peaceful Christmas day. Don’t be afraid to tell people NO if you don’t want to do something. They probably get their way more often than you do anyway.

Much love and wishing you peace,

Annie β€πŸ’•πŸ’™πŸŒ·πŸŒ·πŸŒΉπŸŒΉπŸ’πŸ’πŸ’žπŸ’—πŸ’β„β„β›„β›„β›„πŸŒ πŸŒ‹πŸ€πŸŒΌπŸŒΎπŸŒΏβ„β„πŸŒ”πŸŒ“πŸŒ˜πŸŒ‹πŸŒ‹πŸŒ‹πŸŒ‹πŸŒ‹πŸŒ‹πŸŒŒπŸŒŒπŸŒ πŸŒ πŸŒ πŸŒ πŸŒ πŸŒ πŸŒ‹πŸŒ‹


christmas, holiday, holiday ideas, holiday top 10 list, INTROVERT, mental illness, top 10 list, top ten list

Top 10 or 20 Christmas List

Christmas List

  1. Peace of mind
  2. Meaningful connection
  3. Conversation with a stranger that makes them feel good about themselves
  4. Children’s laughter
  5. Another step towards enlightenment
  6. Financial stability leading towards independence
  7. Passion and intimacy
  8. New creative projects
  9. Better sleep
  10. More learning
  11. New frienships
  12. Another bunny
  13. A new flute
  14. A wooden rennaissance recorder
  15. Art supplies
  16. Someplace that feels like home
  17. Someone that feels like home
  18. More NLP and hypnosis skills and practice
  19. Help with the business part of my business
  20. Love
christmas, holiday ideas, holidays, mental illness

Christmas Foods from Around the World

Are any of you making or having foods from your culture for the holidays? I think it is fun to try new foods from around the world.

I was thinking of trying to make some simple recipes for my kids to try, by getting recipe ideas from my followers.

I do not have normal cooking facilities so they would need to be able to be achieved with a large toaster oven, Β and an electric skillet.

My grandmother on my father’s side was from Poland….or at least her parents were. I think that her older siblings were born in Poland and she and the younger ones were born in the United States.

There is a cookie recipe that was passed down to me and I will share it with you before Christmas. I think I will have to ask my father to send it to me again.

The other thing I remember my grandmother makinig is kilbasa. We always had two platters of kilbasa.

One plate had hot kilbasa, with a bowl of mustard next to it. The other plate had cold kilbasa, with a bowl of white vinegar to dip it in.

I grew up with the cold kilbasa and white vinegar. My father loved it. I did not like it as a little kid but it grew on me over time.

So what special foods or recipes are you planning to have for the holidays ? If you want to share a recipe on your blog you can put a link in the comments.



christmas blogs, christmas e-cards, health, holiday blog, holiday ideas, holidays, mental illness

My favorite Christmas blogs / Belated Insomniac Post from Last Night

OK. This is very silly but I am going to write last night’s good night post now. I was soooo tired from wrapping the gifts for 4 hours and my neck and back were killing me from bending forward to wrap. I do remember starting to think about the good night post just before i fell asleep somewhere around 4:30 am, I think.

I was thinking about all of the posts that people put to say Merry Christmas. They were all unique and it was nice to read all of them. Some people were very cheerful and excited. Some people were very traditional. Some were sentimental and some were funny. Others were sad or bordering on suicidal. (You may not have read those it depends who you follow.)

Some of them were reaching out to others who might be depressed or even suicidal.

And some were talking about the fact that they felt that people are often hypocritical on the holidays because they are concerned about love, family and sentiment then but not the rest of the year. People suddenly talk about charities and helping others, but the rest of the year they don’t bother or don’t care.

What I wanted to do last night was put links to my favorite christmas posts and try to give a variety of the moods and perspectives that I described above. Some of you may not have as eclectic of a range of blogs you follow as I do. I have all different ones and i also read the fresh pressed ones.

1.Cute , cheerful Christmas Haiku…

2.Very truthful and from the heart. Talks about hypocrisy but also reaches out to those who are suffering from depression this Christmas. Very well written post.

3.Reaches out to those who are suffering and even provides a link for people suffering with mental illness issues on Christmas. Very nice post

4. Peace and love sentimental and very nice. Looks like a Christmas card

5. Martin Armstrong economic and historical cycles expert posted this card of a so cute little 2 year old girl which must be his granddaughter

Merry Christmas to All & Happy Hanukkah

I picked five but there were many more great ones. Merry Christmas.


holidays, life

Going Shopping Yay !

The severe pain episode has finally subsided.I feel much better today. The low pressure system from the storm must have been exasperating the joint inflamation of the arthritis. Arthritis is a terrible thing. People who do not live with it cannot see the pain it causes.

I also have herniated discs in my neck. One of them is pressing towards the right and seems to be getting worse. It pinches on the nerves in my neck and sends pain down my arm and it makes my fingers numb. It is hard for me to type a lot of the time because of the numbness.

So today I feel very much better. You don’t truly appreciate feeling well until you are really sick. The pain I had yesterday which started the night before was tormenting. It started in my neck and then went into my jaw (it does that sometimes) then into my head. I had a headache so bad, I could hardly see. My eyes would not focus.

It was also in the joints of my hips and knees.

So Annie is back now! Ready to make everyone laugh a little and cry a little. πŸ™‚

I am going to take my older daughter (she is 17) to Target to choose Christmas presents for herself. Her father just gave me the allotted money yesterday. He wanted to get it to me sooner but there was a problem with his deposit that was not his fault. He really does try hard and I know he loves the girls.

But now I have his credit card and an allotted amount πŸ™‚ Yay !!!

By the way, I am sure I am unique, in that my ex husband will trust me with his credit card with thousands of dollars on it, and trust me to spend only $100. He has done it for years. He never worries about trusting me.

He knows I do not believe in doing bad things that will bite me on my dupa (that is Polish for ass) later on. Besides I am still good friends with him and I would not do anything to betray the friendship.

So off I go with the credit card to shop!! I am usually very poor. I live well below the poverty level. A credit card with $100 to spend on each kid is sooooooooooooooooooooo exciting to me ! They need shoes and clothes and stuff. I can get them some make up and hair stuff too.

Also it is nice to go out with each of them individually. It is good mommy – daughter time.

I feel like Wilma and Betty in the Flintstones cartoon. Do you remember that? When they would get the credit cards from their husbands (fred and barnie) they would say “Charge ! it!)

So funny.. I had no idea when I was a kid what the heck they meant by charge it LOL

The daughter just poked her head into my bedroom to let me know she is ready to go shopping now. Wish me fun !!

I have to take advantage of a low pain day (well on my scale low is probably not low to others) while the opportunity is here!

Good night post will be forthcoming !


anxiety, christmas, holidays, mental health, mental illness

Holiday Anxiety

Be proactive this holiday season. Make sure you do not lose track of yourself in the midst of all the chores, errands, and worrying about what others want.

Every season, people become depressed and have horrible anxiety. Keep on top of yours from the beginning of the season. Holiday Anxiety and Depression – It is like an infection – It is easier to prevent that to cure it.

Keep your daily schedule reasonable. Don’t try to do more than you can do. You are not a super-hero. It will exhaust you and your resistance to illness, anxiety and depression will go way down.

Keep up with the basics – sleep and rest !!

Remember , people always expect you to do all kinds of things. But they are not aware of what is going on at your job and in other areas of your life. They are also not aware of what is going on in your mind. They do not know the anxiety or depression you are feeling. They cannot be the judge of how much is too much.

You can’t please everyone. In fact, some people will complain anyway, even if you make inhuman efforts to make them happy. Some people could have the whole world and would still complain it is not enough.

You can only do what you can do. You have to know what is reasonable for you. That is all you should try to do. You will just frustrate yourself otherwise. Then on Christmas you will see that one little thing would not have made any difference anyway.

Make time for yourself. Don’t spend every minute you are not working preparing for Christmas. It is not fair to you.

If you would not expect someone else to endure the level of your errands and chores and work schedule, then don’t try to endure it yourself. Cut some things out. Christmas will come and then it will be over in a flash.

Take care of yourself. You deserve to have a good holiday too. Not just all the people who you are trying to satisfy.


christmas, holiday stress, holidays, top 10 list, Uncategorized

Annie’s Top Ten Lists – Top Ten Annoying Things About the Holidays

10. The closer you get to the mall, the more people cut in front of you, practically taking the front of your car off.

9. The bell ringers will ring that damn bell right in your ear and publicly shame you if you don’t put a quarter in their bucket, even if your hands are full.

8. Your mother-in-law will ask you what you want for Christmas and then get you exactly the opposite.

7. No matter how hard you try, there will be three hours of wrapping to do on Christmas Eve.

6. Old ladies will rip a toy right out of your hand, in Walmart, because it is the last one.

5. You gain ten pounds eating chocolate, because you know someone will talk you into cutting the junk food for a New Years resolution and you’ve got to fill up now.

4. They start the Christmas music in the stores so early in the season that you can’t stand it by Christmas.

3. When you arrive at the homeless shelter to volunteer, one of the food servers offers you a bowl of soup because the stress of the holidays has reduced you to looking like you slept outside.

2. You run out of scotch tape at 11:30 pm on Christmas Eve when you have three gifts left to wrap.

1. All of the radio stations on Christmas Day are playing Christmas music. You would kill to hear a rock song.