blogging, short story, Writing prompt

A Fun Sensual Silly Fantasy Starter For You This Morning…

A beautiful woman had been stranded on a deserted island, in the tropics, for many months. She was the only survivor of a terrible shipwreck which was caused by a drunk driving sea captain.

He had received previous SSWI tickets. (Sailing a Ship While Intoxicated ) tickets from the Coast but he was stupid and still drank while Sailing. His favorite drink was Jack Daniels.

Everyone died in the shipwreck except the woman in my story. Some of them drowned and others were eaten by sharks.

One of the men survived the shipwreck and was intending to swim to shore but was lured by a malicious mermaid out to sea

Our story character….   let us call her… “Sensualana” …swam to shore. She was a strong swimmer but still almost did not make the long distance.

She finally collapsed upon the shore and slept there exhausted for hours. Some pirates came and stole her clothes but did not take advantage of her.

I don’t know why. If you run unto them, you can ask them. I also do not know why they did not capture her or how in the world she did not wake up while pirates were tearing off her clothing.

When she awoke, she got herself up and went about the business of surviving on a tropical island. For the purposes of my silly story, she easily found shelter and learned how to get plenty of food.

She never thought about why she was naked or wondered where her clothes went.

She was creative and resourceful. She also had developed a great tan with no tan lines.. .since she was all alone on the island ….so she thought.

Little did she know that an indiginous tribe had been watching her. They knew the territory so well that they easily kept hidden from her, as a few of them watched her as she gathered her fruits and berries.

She entertained herself by singing and she had also fashioned a flute type of instrument out of a hollow wooden branch.

The men of the indiginous tribe  loved  to listen to her music. They found it stragely erotic and yet soothing.

Once a dolphin swam up to the shore to listen to Sensualana play her flute.

The music had magical powers and so the dolphin sprouted wings and began to fly…

Either that or Sensualla had eaten the wrong kind of wild  mushrooms for breakfast….

Alas, one of the tribal men fell madly in lust with her. One day he was watching her as she was fishing in the ocean.

He admired her resourcefulness and her ability to make fishing tools from what she found here and there on the island.

She caught many fish and knew she would have a feast for dinner.

She left her fish in a bucket on the shore and decided to take a swim in the water. She dove underneath the waves and swam.

The man did not see her for a minute or so and almost ran out of his hiding place to see if she was drowning.

Momentarily he saw her head come up out of the undulating waves. She swam closer to shore and the sunlight danced off of her golden long hair.

The man watched…  entranced. .. as the beautiful woman stood up in the water. The ocean water was waist deep and he could see the rest of her naked back.

Her curves were perfect and the man thought she must be a goddess.

Her hair hung down to her waist. She reached her arms up to run her fingers through her hair. As she turned, the man could see her from the front.

Her beauty was so stunning that he lost the strength in his knees. His foot moved and a branch he stepped upon made a noise.

She heard this and looked towards his direction. …..

What happens next is for your imagination to enjoy………:)

If anyone wants to continue the rest of the story in writing feel free to copy and paste this and then write your own ending. Simply designate where your part begins and credit my part to my blog.

Send link to me in the comments. Keep it a little silly or unrealistic,  in order to stay with the style and mood.

Have a lovely, creative day,

Annie<3

family, funny story, life, mishaps, non-fiction, parenting, short stories, short story

If you Can’t Find the Ice Scraper…Stay Out of the Kitchen !

My teenage daughter and I got into a conversation about her driving soon. She is 18 and I have to take her to get her learner’s permit soon.

I began mentioning safety rules and things like that. It was raining outside, which made me want to talk to her about rules for driving on slippery roads.

Somehow this conversation went into funny stories about what NOT to do with the car.

I told her that my mother once could not find the ice scraper. She was late for work so she decided to improvise.

She went into the kitchen…yes the kitchen… What do you think her tool of choice was?

No. you didn’t guess it. A butter knife! Yes, she scraped the windshield of my step father’s black cadillac with red interior with a butter knife.

Needless to say, he was not too happy with all the scratches all over the windshield.

But then….my daughter said she could top my story!

She said that a few winters ago, her grandmother (my ex husband’s mother) did something worse than the butter knife to the windshield.

I thought..what could be worse?

My daughter said “It was MUCH worse !” 

Well, I was in suspense.

So, the story starts the same way that my story did. 

The windshield was full of ice. She could not find the ice scraper.

SO………

She went into the kitchen….yes the kitchen..

Nope, not a butter knife.

She got out a pot and boiled some water. Yes….here it comes..

She poured boiling water all over the frozen windshield !

Yes, it cracked. It cracked all over the place. It made a terrible noise, which is what she noticed first and then a little crack that just kept going. Then more cracks.

Needless to say,  Grandpa was not happy when he came home.

So, both of my daughter’s grandmothers wrecked their windshields when they could not find the ice scraper, and decided to seek tools from the kitchen. .my mother and my ex husband;s mother.

So, the moral to the story is one of the following.

1. When you think you have the best story about your relatives….someone can top you !

2. If you can’t find the ice scraper….Stay Out of the Kitchen !

funny kids, funny story, kids, life, parenting, single mom

Are Ponies Real?

My 18 year old daughter relayed this funny story to me today. She was spending time with her little 7 year old cousin. This is my niece, who is a very cute little girl.

My daughter recently was hired at her first job. She will be starting this coming week and of course is very excited. She was telling my little niece that when she got paid, she would be able to buy her a little gift, with her first paycheck.

My daughter was being silly with her and said  “I can get you something you will like, but not a ferris wheel or a pony.”

The little one looked at her and said, “I do not want a ferris wheel and ponies are not even real ! “

My daughter was kind of stunned and said to her  “You don’t think ponies are real?”

The little one said, “NO silly! You know that unicorns and ponies are not real ! “

At this point my 8 year old nephew chimed in with  ” Unicorns are too real !   I saw one in the yard one time ! “

The older brother who is 13 said  “That was a deer ! It was not a unicorn ! “

At this point in telling me the story, my daughter was laughing so hard she could hardly continue.

Apparently my daughter’s uncle was there are decided to chime in. He asked them,  “Are mermaids real?” 

“No,”  they said.

“Are horses real?”

“Yes,” they said

“Are zebras real?”

The little boy said, “Yes we saw a zebra at the zoo last year.”

To which his father, who has a goofy sort of sense of humor, said  “No. That was not a Zebra. It was a Zoobra. “

All of the kinds just stared at him and were not sure what to think.

Once my daughter stopped  laughing, then she went through all the animals with them. The fairy tale ones and the real ones. I guess they all had different opinions about which animals were real and which ones weren’t real.

It must be a funny land inside of a child’s mind.

funny kids, life, parenting humor

Happy Mess

When my kids were little they used to worry if they spilled something.  So, I used to “accidentally” spill something on myself, in front of them, and say “Look Mama is a mess!”

“But Mama is a happy mess because I am happy to have you!”

This was my way of seperating their idea of happiness from making a mistake. I wanted them to know that they could be happy in general,  even if things went wrong in the moment.

They thought this was very funny. Anytime I spilled something,  either by accident or on purpose,  they would laugh happily and say, “Look! Mama is a happy mess!  She is happy because she has me!”

I remember once being at the grocery store, in the check out aisle, and I dropped something.

My daughter quickly looked up at the cashier and said, ” That’s my Mama! She is a Happy Mess!”

The cashier looked a bit puzzled and my daughter was smiling.

Then my daughter said to the cashier, “I drop and spill things too. And then I am a Happy Mess, just like Mama.”