dark poetry, depression, insomnia, mental illness, narcissistic abuse syndrome, poetry, psychological abuse, Ptsd from abuse, PTSD from domestic abuse

Cell Phone Light

The light from the cell phone
Only partially illuminates the room
All else is silent but the wind
And the sound of the tiny clicks
that sound out loud
each time a letter is typed

The writing keeps me thinking
The writing stops me from thinking too much
About the darkness
The writing keeps me feeling
The writing keeps me from feeling too much
Of the darkness

The resonating echo of the clicks
Filling the emptiness of the room
Makes me feel some safety …
Something familiar
Something “normal”
Something reliable
Something to frighten
the darkness away

To ward it off
To block it’s path
To distract my mind
To pretend it cannot reach me
But it’s all around
I can feel it rising
From the floors of the bedroom
To the top of the mattress

But I just keep typing
To hear the clicking
Of the cell phone keys in the dark
Because it isn’t the darkness
From the lack of light
That frightens me the very most
But the other darkness that rises
And closes all around me
That no one thinks is there
And no one else can see

compassion, domestic abuse, kindness, life, mental abuse, mental health, mental illness, ptsd, self-esteem, self-help

For Those Who are Feeling Lonely Today

For those who are feeling lonely today…

You are not alone

There are others who care

They may not be the ones right next to you

They may not be the ones in your house, in your family

Sometimes we have to find our own family

There are people who would love to connect with you

You are just lone today but not forever

Reach out to others and find the ones who care

Your true friends are the ones who are still there when things are bad

Your true friends stand by you

The others are not worth having anxiety over

Seek kindness where there is a capacity for kindness

Not all people have a capacity for empathy or kindness

Stop looking for empathy and understanding where there is not any

Look for people who have the capacity for empathy, understanding and kindness

They are out there

You are not doomed to be lonely forever

You are a unique person and you have a purpose being here

Your individuality matters to the world

You are with yourself

Love yourself

Take care of yourself

Show compassion to those who have compassion

Show empathy to those that you think have empathy

You will see the ones who can care and understand

Do not try to make people into something they are not

Do not try to fool yourself into thinking you can make certain people care, if they do not

It holds you back from finding the ones who will truly love you for who you are

There are people who will love you for who you are, not what you do

Do not try to prove your love to anyone

If you have to prove yourself to them, then they do not love you

You are worthy of love just the way you are

For your unique gifts and unique personality

Your experiences follow you

But do not let them direct you

You matter

life, poetry


The crisp coolness of the night

Cuts sharply against my skin

The moon watches me silently

Offering a dim illumination of the street

Like a nightlight in the darkness

Lighting my path with no emotion

No comfort from the moon tonight

No comfort from the midnight light

It’s companionship is not the same

As someone who could whisper my name

And hold my hand to silence the pain

And speak of romance and love again

One step of footsteps are better as two, Yet

I walk through the darkness lamenting of you