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The people that try to make you feel guilt or shame over not doing what they want you to do, are just serving their own agenda.
If they continue to try to emotionally manipulate you, they have no concern for your reality. They do not respect your right to see things from your own point of view.
People will claim to know what you should start doing…or stop doing..that will make you a better person. But take a closer look and see that they are trying to get you to fit into their own agenda.
You do not have to change your core beliefs to make someone else’s reality more comfortable. They are clearly not changing their beliefs to suit you.
If you are not trying to guilt and shame them, then what right do they have to do it to you. What gives one person, or one group of people, exclusive rights to know everything that everyone “should” and “should not” be doing?
Shaming people is not loving. Any group or individual that is making you feel bad about yourself, or trying to make you question your own truth to support theirs, is more concerned with serving their own agenda than wanting you to be your authentic self.
People that claim to care about your best interest, but try to shame and guilt you into changing for them, do not have your best interest at heart….but they have their own best interest at heart.
So let them continue to follow their own path and do what they feel best supports them…..while you follow your own path and do what best supports you.
Why is it okay for them to want an environment they feel safe and supported in….but you are selfish because you also want to feel safe and supported?
You can make changes, learn new things and progress towards a goal any way you desire to, but your innate beauty and self worth are fully in tact right now at this minute.
Other creatures like bunnies are beautiful just the way they are and they do not need to change or grow or do anything in particular in order for us to see the beauty and value in them.
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They cannot do anything to contribute to the household other than just to be there. They cannot do anything for people but strangers come up to them in the store and want to see them.
There is an innate beauty in life and in living things because of the spiritual nature of life itself. The possibilities for the new baby are endless.
People sometimes feel they envy the baby and the endless possibilities it has to become anything it wants to become. But you can still become anything you want to become. Your possibilities are still available to you of you can see reality as less rigid than the matrix you perceive it to be.
You have an inner beauty as well as an outer beauty. There is no path you can take which will add or subtract from the spiritual being that you are.
It does not change the fact that you are beautiful right now, and your self worth in perfect, even more than you can imagine.
This video is really fun. They have these little tricks that you can make from common objects that you would have in your house or in your purse. They set up the trick and ask people to try to figure out the method. Then the people have fun trying to figure out the trick to it.
After a few tries and the people cannot figure it out, then the guy shows them the trick and you can see how it is done.
I like watching things like this. They are a great distraction from anxiety and stress that you may be experiencing. It kind of takes you out of your head and into something else that is fun.
This particular one sets up a trick that uses a matchbook with the wooden matches and an Altoid mint candy.
Here is another video from Scam School. This one teaches you a couple of super cool magic tricks that you can perform for people. They are easy but they look hard when you do them.
The first one used a newspaper and the magician has you choose where he cuts a strip from the paper. It ends up that he predicts what the words will be where the paper gets cut with the scissors. You have to watch it to see how this works. Super cool !
If you have social anxiety, these little tricks might help you to break the ice with people. You can do them at home or at a restaurant or a bar.
These kinds of things are great for increasing the plasticity of your brain. Any kind of re-wiring work you are doing will work better if your brain plasticity is better. Learning new things like can actually help with your recovery and healing from C-PTSD and PTSD.
Because the brain is stuck in a certain loop of thought patterns, you want to break up the thought patterns that have been programmed into you by other people.
Here is one with coin tricks.
About 1 in 5 people in the U.S. and England suffer from some kind of mental disorder. Other European countries have similar statistics from about 27 percent to 30 percent. Studies in South Africa say that over 30 percent of adults have suffered from some form of mental illness during their lifetime.
The statistics that have been gathered are similar is most countries with mental illness affecting about 1 in 4 to 1 in 6 people. This is based on information that has been able to be gathered but keep in mind that many people never seek treatment.
People have reasons for not seeking mental health diagnosis due to fear of stigma, lack of enough mental health facilities, lack of health insurance and other personal reasons that deter them.
A mental disorder does not mean you cannot function, keep a job, be a good parent, or that you are not as good as other people. Something is defined as a “disorder” when it interferes in your life in some way. This varies from person to person as to how your life may be affected.
Many people with a mental illness need medication in order to attain their best functionality and their best quality of life. Others are able to manage their mental illness with therapy or other intervention type treatments. Some people choose to use holistic or spiritual methods to deal with their mental illness.
There are many different mental disorders including depression, bipolar disorder, borderline personality disorder and anxiety disorders such as PTSD and C-PTSD, Everyone is not born with mental illness and all mental illness does not have a genetic factor.
The brain can be affected by trauma and by abuse. Disorders such as PTSD and C-PTSD are caused by abuse or trauma. Other disorders like depression and severe anxiety disorders can have roots in abuse including emotional and mental abuse. There is also a high number of people with other disorders that also either had abuse during their childhood or domestic violence as adults.
Mental and emotional trauma can be caused by violence upon or around a person. It can be caused by being in a traumatic event or witnessing a traumatic event. Other things like living through a natural disaster, living in poverty, the loss of a child, wartime exposure, and many other things.
The brain creates associations related to what it has experienced. Associations in the brain can cause emotional responses that arise from connections in the neural pathways. Different parts of the brain are affected by different mental illnesses. These can be seen in CT scans which were done to study the brains of people with bipolar. depression, OCD and other mental disorders.
If you or a loved one suffers from mental illness you are not alone. With the percentage of mental disorders being around 30 percent most people have friends, family members or loved ones that have a mental disorder of some kind. You may not know about mental illness in all of your friends or family because some people keep it a secret from others.
Mental illness is nothing to be ashamed of. The stigma about mental illness makes the problem worse by causing people to fear seeking help or to talk to anyone about it.
You are not your mental illness. Neither is your friend or family member. People with mental illness are not usually dangerous. There are only a few mental illnesses that predispose people to violence. Most people with mental illness are suffering within themselves and not causing harm to others at all.
Suicide rates are high in every country. There many death related to suicide and the feelings of hopelessness, shame, guilt , fear and worthlessness that people live with. People who suffer from mental illness are not all the same. People are people and they are all individuals.
Please do not see yourself as your diagnosis or as a label. You are unique and no one is just like you. Each person was born with value and worth that is innate. If you suffer from mental illness you should not have to feel shame about it. You just have an illness that is just as real as any physical illness.
People with physical diseases and illnesses are more likely to be recognized and less likely to be judged as a person, in regards to their diagnosis. Just because mental illness is invisible does not make it any less real or the suffering any less.
There is no one quite like you. You are unique in many ways. You are a spiritual being that is existing in the body you are inhabiting.
You could have made different choices that may have sent you on a slightly different path. You may have ended up at a different job or with different people if you had made different moves on the chess board.
You still would have been the same being. Your values may be re-prioritized as you grow and learn. There are no paths that change you from who you were born as into a completely different spiritual being.
You have no way to know how things would have turned out if you had made different choices because life is unpredictable and you cannot control others.
There is no need to feel bad over decisions that you think sent you away from the “right” path. You have no way to know what would have happened or if it would not have been worse.
Even things you feel that you really screwed up….you don’t really know that it would have been the way you picture it to be if you had not done that.
It does not serve you to hold shame and guilt about the past. You are still on your journey either way.
Your story is not completed. Often there are many paths that lead to the same place.
Any one decision from your past could have sent you a different way that could have landed you somewhere similar eventally…or somewhere worse depending on the events that could have followed that decision.
Life is full of unknowns and there are many things you cannot control…such as other people.
Memories tend to deceive us anyway. They are images and feelings that are filtered through our perception at the time …in addition to our current perception.
But the memories are missing information that we did not have such as what another person was really thinking or feeling.
You may regret ending a relationship and you are sure that you lost the best thing that will ever come your way. But you do not know for sure what the other person was thinking or what they would have been feeling a year from then.
These are all unknowns. Memories can deceive us because our brains fill in missing information. The story we create about what would have happened is just that….a story.
Life is in the present. We are affected by our past experiences and what meaning that our brains attach to those experiences.
Being in the present without carrying shame and guilt is the best way to be able to experience our spiritual selves to the fullest extent.
We are not who we are because of the things we have done. The things we did were based on what was happening at the time.
We had certain meaning attached to the things that were happening. We may not even be in touch with that meaning anymore.
We do not really fully remember exactly how we felt at that time. Many details are forgotten over time, including what triggers may have been occurring and what fears we may have been feeling at that moment.
Carrying shame and guilt over our past decisions is unfair you ourselves. It only serves to lower your self esteem and interferes with your ability to make decisions that are good for you now.
Judgement of ourselves is bad enough when it is done by others. When other people hold anger and judgement about us it is from their own perception of the past.
Just like us, their memories are bits of pictures and feelings with much of the information being filled in by their own brain which tells a story.
Details that are unknown to them, such as how you felt and what was happening in your subconscious mind, are missing from their information…so they make things up to fill in the holes.
Much of what they project onto you comes from their own perception and is wrong. So their jugdement of you is coming from a flawed reality of what really happened.
Do not carry other people’s judgement of your past as your true past. It is not true reality. You are not able to reach your possibilities if you are carrying these things with you.
You are the same spiritual being that was born. Your decisions and choices seemed neccassary at the time. They are in the past now.
Allow yourself to lift this weight from yourself. You will be able to be there for the people in your life right now, in a much more meaningful way, if you can be yourself and accept that you have innate worth.
You were born with worth and your past does not change that. We spend too much energy carrying memories that are convoluted anyway.
Your life is here and now. It does not matter how you ended up here. How you got where you are is no indication of where you can go and what possibilities your life holds for you.
Past limitations are just shadows. You have much more potetial than you realize yet. Just allow for the possibility that you can do greater things than you can imagine right now.
There is great power in allowing for possibiities and not limiting yourself based on what you think you remember doing in the past.
Your possibilities are full and your value is still for you to discover.